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Verdict: A sharp, funny, very Jewish winter-break romance with a scene-stealing corgi and a voice the trade press loved, undercut by a romance that skips most of the enemies phase it was sold on.
Best for: Readers who want a closed-door sapphic YA rom-com for the holidays, who come for banter and a messy, real eighteen-year-old narrator, and who can forgive a love story that moves at first-love speed.
Heat level: ★★☆☆☆ (2/5 — behind closed doors)
Rating: ★★★★☆ (3.6/5 — a 3.76 Goodreads average across 9,183 ratings, two starred trade reviews, and a steady minority who wanted the enemies part to last longer than a chapter)
Tropes: Enemies-to-lovers (briefly), meet-cute by car, snowed in together, winter fling, first love after heartbreak, Jewish representation, museum internship, found family, healing from a past relationship, single first-person POV.
How to Excavate a Heart by Jake Maia Arlow is a standalone young adult contemporary lesbian romance, published by HarperTeen in November 2022, set across one snowy Washington, D.C. winter break. Shani, a college freshman with a paleoichthyology internship and a freshly broken heart, meets May by nearly running her over with her mother’s car, and then cannot stop running into her.
It holds a 3.76 average across 9,183 Goodreads ratings and collected starred reviews from Kirkus and Publishers Weekly, plus warm notices from Booklist and School Library Journal. The professionals agree almost completely; the readers split, mostly over one thing. Both halves of that split are worth understanding before you start.
What Is How to Excavate a Heart About?
How to Excavate a Heart is YA marketed as a holiday rom-com, but it is really a coming-of-age book about the first month of independence. Both leads are eighteen and in college, so the book sits at the top end of YA and readers shelve it as new adult almost as often. YA means closed-door; holiday means a clock. The internship runs about a month, then everyone goes back to school.
Shani arrives in D.C. missing a lot. She has no girlfriend after a breakup she hasn’t processed, no patience for her mother’s texts, and no idea how to be a person outside a relationship. She has a to-do list instead. May is sure Shani is a menace, which is fair after the car. The book is told entirely in Shani’s first person, so you get her jokes, her catastrophising and her blind spots at full volume. May is seen only through Shani, which is the main reason some readers find May hard to warm to.
What Makes This Sapphic YA Holiday Romance Work
- The voice: Every trade review singles out Shani’s narration and the banter. Publishers Weekly calls it a “cozy and sharply funny confection”, and “funny” is the second most-chosen mood on StoryGraph at 65%.
- Jewish representation: Both leads are Jewish, and it is the most-mentioned element in the Goodreads reviews I sampled. Kirkus specifically credits the shared Ashkenazi heritage with enriching the romance.
- The supporting cast: Shani’s nonagenarian landlord, her older lesbian mentor at the museum and a corgi in snow booties come up again and again. Several readers say the side characters are the best thing in the book.
- The setting: The Smithsonian’s Natural History museum and a snowed-in D.C. give it a specific, nerdy texture that is unusual for enemies-to-lovers YA.
- A heavy thread handled seriously: Beneath the comedy, Shani has something to confront from her last relationship. Kirkus and the Tufts Daily both praise how carefully it is handled, though readers are less unanimous.
Book Synopsis
Shani has a plan for winter break, and it does not involve feelings. She has landed a month-long internship studying fossil fish at the Smithsonian, a room in a nonagenarian’s D.C. house, and a strict personal code. She will work, visit museums, ignore her mother and stop thinking about the girlfriend who ended things right before the holidays. Then she clips a stranger with her mom’s Subaru.
The stranger is May, and May is not impressed. That should be the end of it, except a dog-walking job keeps putting Shani in May’s path, and their irritation turns into banter faster than either of them would like. May has her own plans, her own family complications and no interest in being anyone’s rebound.
When a storm leaves the two of them snowed in on Christmas Eve, the fling stops feeling casual. But whenever things get serious, the breakup comes back, along with parts of that relationship Shani has not yet let herself look at. The internship is ending and both of them are due back at college. Shani has a few weeks to work out whether she is ready to commit, or whether she should keep May as a winter story she tells later.
My Review
The voice is the reason to read this, so I’ll start there. Shani is funny in the way real eighteen-year-olds are funny: defensive, self-mocking and occasionally unkind to the people who love her most. Arlow lets her be wrong a lot, and the comedy comes from that rather than from set pieces. Kirkus, Publishers Weekly, Booklist and School Library Journal all reach for the same words (funny, sharp, banter).
The second strength is the world around the romance. The museum gives Shani something she actually cares about apart from girls, and her mentor there gives her an older queer woman to talk to, which YA rarely bothers with. StoryGraph readers rate it 72% character-driven, and 85% call the characters loveable. The Jewishness is not decoration either. It shapes how both girls feel about a Christmas-saturated city, and it is the thing readers thank the book for most often.
Where it struggles is the romance’s pace, and that is not my personal gripe. It is the most repeated criticism in the low-star reviews by a distance. About nine independent readers across Goodreads and romance.io say some version of the same thing: the hostility lasts a scene or two, then the two are suddenly at galleries and falling hard, and nobody sees the turn happen. Several call it insta-love. One points out that they agree to take things slowly and then say “I love you” within about three weeks. The second theme is likeability. Around seven readers find Shani or May immature or abrasive, and two separately object to Shani flirting with a younger teenage boy for free coffee while dodging her mother’s calls.
One expectation to reset is the marketing. The cover copy sells a “Christmas enemies-to-lovers rom-com”. Readers say the enemies part is mostly the car accident and that the holidays, Christmas or Hanukkah, sit in the background rather than driving the plot. Shani also has a serious reckoning with her past relationship late in the book, and the blurb gives no sign of it. If the enemies-to-lovers label is what drew you, lower your expectations. If you wanted a gentle holiday comfort read, know that it carries real weight in the last act.
My honest note: A genuinely funny, well-voiced YA romance whose love story runs faster than its own premise. If you need the hostility to simmer before the turn, this will frustrate you. If you read YA for the voice and the people around the couple, it is a warm, smart winter read.
| Element | In How to Excavate a Heart |
|---|---|
| Central relationship | Shani & May — a newly dumped paleoichthyology intern and the girl she nearly hits with a car, both eighteen and Jewish |
| Core tropes | Enemies-to-lovers (brief), meet-cute by accident, snowed in together, winter fling, first love after heartbreak |
| Setting | Washington, D.C. over winter break: the Smithsonian’s Natural History museum and a snowbound rented room |
| Heat level | 2/5 — behind closed doors |
| Series | Standalone — ends with the couple together; no sequel |
| Content notes | Past sexual assault and a controlling relationship with an ex, revealed late; cursing; alcohol; a minor car accident |
How Spicy Is How to Excavate a Heart?
Not very. romance.io rates it 2/5, “behind closed doors”, from 44 ratings. YA Books Central’s reviewer reports plenty of kissing and making out, nothing overtly sexual on the page,. Intimacy is a subject rather than a set piece. School Library Journal notes that Shani is working through barriers to emotional and physical closeness, and one reader goes as far as saying sex plays a large part in the book, as a subject rather than, by every other account, as anything on the page.
What you should know in advance is the late-book reveal about Shani’s ex. It is discussed in retrospect, not depicted as a scene, but StoryGraph users still tag sexual assault and a toxic relationship as major warnings. No reviewer I found flags anything else. If you want this register of low heat elsewhere, I Kissed Shara Wheeler and the office Christmas romance Humbug both sit at the closed-door end of the scale.
Who Should Read This Book?
You’ll likely love it if: you read for voice and banter above plot, you want Jewish sapphic leads in a December book, you enjoy a flawed narrator who grows up a little on the page, and you want a closed-door read you could hand to an older teen.
You may want to skip it if: you need enemies-to-lovers with real, sustained hostility, a fast “I love you” breaks the spell for you, immature or self-absorbed narrators wear you out, or you want a cosy holiday read with no heavy material underneath.
In short: a funny, specific, warm-hearted YA romance whose love story is rushed and whose label oversells the rivalry.
What Readers Are Actually Saying (October 2026)
Nothing new is driving this book right now, and that is the finding. It has been out four years, and I found no visible BookTok footprint or award run. My attempt to search Reddit failed, so I can’t report on that front either way. What it has is steady library and seasonal circulation. It is widely held by public libraries in every format, and Amazon now lists the Kindle edition under a “holiday and Christmas gifting” title, The trade coverage was strong: Kirkus and Publishers Weekly starred it, and Kirkus called it “warming as hot chocolate in a blizzard.” Amazon’s 4.2 across 293 ratings shows almost no one-star anger. Only 1% of Goodreads ratings are one star, which tells you the critics are disappointed rather than angry.
The audiobook is narrated by Hope Newhouse and runs 8 hours 38 minutes. I found no listener commentary on the narration, positive or negative. One reviewer did finish it in a single workday sitting, which says something for its pace.
Prefer audio? Listen to How to Excavate a Heart on Libro.fm — the audiobook shop that supports independent bookstores.
Why readers love it (according to the discourse): The Jewish representation comes first. It came up in nearly half the Goodreads reviews I sampled. Next is the corgi, named in more than a third of the reviews I sampled. Then the humour and banter. “Cute” is the recurring word, StoryGraph readers pick lighthearted (73%) and funny (65%) as the top moods, and 84% say the character development is strong. Notably, even some of the two-star reviewers praise the writing itself. One calls it evocative and gives the second star for the prose alone, so the complaints below are about story choices rather than sentences.
What readers argue about and complain about: Pace, above everything. About nine independent readers say the enemies phase barely exists and the romance jumps from hostility to devotion with no visible middle. Insta-love is the label they use, and romance.io’s crowd tags agree. Second: the leads. Around seven find Shani self-absorbed or May abrasive, and several say the characters read younger than eighteen. Third, and the most interesting: the late reveal about Shani’s ex. Kirkus and the Tufts Daily praise its sensitivity, but a handful of readers found it muddled. They say it arrives around the 80% mark, is alluded to more than discussed, and is not signposted by the blurb. None of the four trade reviews mentions the pacing complaint that dominates the low-star reviews, and the professionals and the critical readers disagree outright on how the assault storyline lands. Opinion genuinely divides on Shani: the flaws one reader finds exasperating, another calls relatable, and 77% of StoryGraph users say flaws are a main focus.
The standalone question worth asking first: it is a true standalone with no sequel and no cliffhanger. Readers describe the couple ending together after an honest conversation before they head back to separate colleges. It is a happy-for-now for two eighteen-year-olds rather than a forever, and at least one sceptical reader doubts it lasts. If you want more Arlow, Leaving the Station (Storytide, August 2025) follows another college girl working out what being a lesbian means on a cross-country train. I could not pull its Goodreads numbers, so treat it as a lead, not a recommendation.
Frequently Asked Questions
Is How to Excavate a Heart spicy?
No. romance.io rates it 2/5, behind closed doors, and reviewers report kissing and making out but nothing explicit on the page. It is a YA novel for ages 14 and up.
Does How to Excavate a Heart have a happy ending?
Yes, a happy-for-now. Readers report that Shani and May end the book together after an honest conversation, before returning to their separate colleges. It is a standalone with no cliffhanger.
Is How to Excavate a Heart really enemies-to-lovers?
Only briefly. The hostility starts with a car accident and fades fast, and it is the most common complaint in the critical reviews. Read it as a winter-fling romance with an antagonistic meet-cute.
What content warnings does How to Excavate a Heart have?
Readers flag past sexual assault and a controlling relationship with Shani’s ex, revealed late in the book and discussed rather than shown. StoryGraph users also tag cursing, alcohol and a minor car accident.
Is there an audiobook of How to Excavate a Heart?
Yes. HarperCollins released an unabridged audiobook narrated by Hope Newhouse, running 8 hours 38 minutes. It is available on Libro.fm and through library apps.
Is it a Christmas book or a Hanukkah book?
Neither, really. It is a winter-break book. Both leads are Jewish and the two are snowed in on Christmas Eve, but readers say the holidays stay in the background rather than driving the story.
If You Loved How to Excavate a Heart, Read These Next
For the same voice-first, closed-door YA energy with a bigger friend group, I Kissed Shara Wheeler is the obvious next step. Its love story divides readers too, just in the opposite direction. If the rivals setup is what you wanted more of, All’s Fair in Love and Field Hockey runs YA rivals-to-lovers with a grief arc underneath, and the same rushed-romance complaint. For the same snowy-December comfort with adult leads, Humbug keeps the door closed and the jokes coming.
For more in this register, browse our sapphic holiday romance favorites or the full Book Reviews collection.
The Bottom Line
How to Excavate a Heart tries to be a holiday rom-com and a book about growing up at the same time, and it is better at the second. Shani’s voice is sharp and funny, the Jewish representation is specific and loved, and the supporting cast gives the book a warmth its central romance doesn’t always earn. The enemies phase is gone almost before it starts, the love story moves at first-love speed, and the late turn into serious territory is not something the cover prepares you for. If you read YA for character and comedy, and you go in knowing about the final act, it is a smart, warm winter read. Check How to Excavate a Heart on Amazon →
The Eikna Overall Ranking
On the Eikna scale, How to Excavate a Heart ranks as a voice-driven sapphic YA winter romance — funny, specific and trade-acclaimed, held back by a rushed love story, and best approached for Shani and the people around her rather than the enemies-to-lovers on the cover.
The Evidence Scorecard
Overall ★★★★☆ 3.6/5
- ✓ 3.76 average across 9,183 Goodreads ratings
- ✓ Starred by Kirkus and Publishers Weekly
- ✓ Only 1% one-star on Goodreads
- ✓ Pacing complaint recurs across about nine readers
Romance ★★★☆☆ 3.4/5
- ✓ Banter praised by all four trade reviews
- ✓ Booklist and PW praise the chemistry
- ✓ Honest pre-goodbye conversation rescues the ending
- ✓ Enemies phase barely exists; insta-love complaints
Characters ★★★★☆ 3.8/5
- ✓ 84% on StoryGraph cite strong character development
- ✓ Landlord, mentor and corgi steal scenes
- ✓ Shani’s flaws are deliberate and examined
- ✓ About seven readers find the leads immature
Writing ★★★★☆ 4/5
- ✓ Biting, sincere first-person voice
- ✓ Funny is StoryGraph’s second mood at 65%
- ✓ Even a two-star reviewer praises the prose
- ✓ A few readers call it flat or predictable
Emotional Impact ★★★★☆ 3.6/5
- ✓ Emotional is StoryGraph’s third mood at 62%
- ✓ Kirkus praises the sensitive assault storyline
- ✓ Jewish identity gives it real texture
- ✓ Late reveal feels muddled to some readers
Heat Level ★★☆☆☆ 2/5
- ✓ romance.io: behind closed doors
- ✓ Kissing and make-outs, nothing explicit
- ✓ Intimacy handled as a theme, not scenes
- ✓ Assault history discussed, tagged by StoryGraph users
Ending ★★★★☆ 3.5/5
- ✓ Standalone, no cliffhanger
- ✓ Couple ends together before college resumes
- ✓ Honest conversation credited by readers
- ✓ Happy-for-now; one reader doubts it lasts
Re-read Value ★★★★☆ 3.6/5
- ✓ Built for a December reread
- ✓ 8h 38m audiobook as a second pass
- ✓ Side cast rewards revisiting
- ✓ Holidays stay thin in the background
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